When it comes to telling others what you really feel about them, this can present a lot of difficulties. We want to tell people what we feel about them but the fact that they will react in an extreme fashion is something that keeps us from expressing what we feel. Just think about it; does anyone like to hear unpleasant things about themselves? No! Nobody does because it really hurts to know that there is something about us that people do not like.
Then what is the option? Do we simply keep quiet and not tell people about the way we really feel? That will not work at least in the long run. When you have someone in your life in the long-term, then it is only right that we tell speak our mind. However, many of us go about doing this the wrong way, which could either come out very harshly or in such uncertain terms that what you are trying to tell them is not really clear.
Here Are Some Tips, Hints And Cautions To Learn How To Speak Your Mind Without Hurting Others:
Know the person: One of the keys to being able to speak your mind without hurting the other person is by knowing them well. Once you are clear about the personality of the other person, then it becomes really easy to know what approach to take. Some people prefer the simple and plain truth while others like to be told things in a flowery manner. You will need to couch the issue in a way so as to soften the blow.
Do not make it a huge issue: One of the biggest mistakes that people make while speaking their mind out to someone is by making the whole thing a big issue. It is best to wait for a point of time when you are calm of mind and put things across succinctly to the other person. This way you are not making a big issue of the whole thing and the other person can also have some peace and quiet to digest what you have said without getting too emotional.
Ensure that the criticism is constructive: One of the instances that creates a lot of bad feelings between people when you take the criticism too far and make it sound as if the other person has no redeeming qualities at all. That is you need to couch the criticism in such a way that you are not only speaking your mind but also not causing too much damage. For example you can go with something like controlling your anger would ensure that you have better interpersonal relationships and that is the only factor that is preventing your personal growth. This way the other person knows that you mean well even if what you are saying is not entirely pleasant.
Make sure that you sound sincere: While you are speaking your mind to someone, do make sure that to win your battles, you pick them with care. What is more being warm and sincere is an important factor when it comes to speaking out your mind to others. People are usually good at judging if you are speaking from your heart or just mouthing the words when it comes to others, and being flippant in such a situation will only make it worse.
Be prepared for some return criticism: One of the main things to remember when you are speaking out your mind is that you will need to be prepared to take in what you dish out to others. Remember, that when people are angry or hurt they tend to lash out at you. Plus, when we feel that others can do with a bit of feedback from us, it is also likely that the other person also feel the same way about you. It is only fair that you hear out what they have to say when they have given you the same courtesy to you.
When it comes to human relationships, the one thing you should know is that in most cases there are no absolutes and it is actually a work in progress. Yes, there are some relationships that have absolute love, respect and confidence in each other, but even these relationships need work when it comes to daily living. This because we as human beings are affected by many things and tend to react in different ways to the same situation when the timing is different.
That is why, while honesty and speaking out your mind is all good, it is important that you look at the picture from a holistic point of view and take things forward accordingly. This may not be easy to do at all times but when you value a relationship, then it is worth taking the time and doing things right.